Here’s a week-opening rant for you. If there’s ever a story that shows how out of touch some wealthy Americans are with their financial situation, this is it. A family making just over $260,000 a year says, “Our needs are being met, but we don’t have a load of cash to cover wants,” and another that makes $400,000 is apparently “barely getting by”.

The story gives a breakdown of the family’s monthly finances, and frankly, if they consider themselves middle class and just getting by, then I must be in the poor house (which I am not). A look at part of their balance sheet:

• $12,000 monthly income after taxes and deductions (medical, 401K, social security): Nice to know they make in a month what I make in about four or five.
• Tithe $1,300 a month to their church: I won’t criticize someone for giving to their church. That’s good. But when the money you can afford to give away is equal to a lot of people’s two-week (or even monthly) income, you should NOT be struggling to get by.
• $4,000 payment on two mortgages and land purchase: Two mortgages, when many Americans are struggling to keep up with their one.
• $1,200 left each month after all the payments and basics (food, etc.): If you can’t cover your wants with $1,200 a month ($300 a week, or $14,400 a year), maybe you need to check your wants. What do you want? A car? I’m sure you can buy a decent one for $14,000. A trip abroad? Four of us went to China for three weeks this year for a total of about $10,000. If $14,400 a year can’t cover your wants, the YOU ARE JUST TOO DAMN GREEDY.

What’s ludicrous to me is that the idea that you can’t have everything just doesn’t seem to register with these people. They say they want a bigger house than the 2,500-square-foot one they have but can’t afford it, yet they are carrying two mortgages right now. Does the word “tradeoff” mean anything to them? Of course, I could also do the guilt-trip thing and point out that their meager 2,500-square-foot house would be home to three of four families in China, or that I just got done talking to people who went on a relief mission to Honduras, where they saw families with as many as 10 kids living in a one-room shack smaller than a 10-by-12-foot office.

Yes, it’s true that depending on where you live, $250,000 won’t go as far as it sounds. But this particular family lives in Sevierville, Tennessee. I just ran a cost-of-living comparison between Durham, N.C., and Tennessee (using Knoxville, the closest city to Sevierville available on the calculator), and the cost of living is actually lower in Tennessee than in Durham, and I can tell you that $250,000 goes a long way in Durham.

The story says whether someone making six figures is “rich” depends on perspective. It says:

To a family earning $50,000, $250,000 is well off, but for the family earning $250,000, rising college and medical costs and dropping home values make the perception debatable.

Oh right, because the family making $50,000 doesn’t have to worry about rising college and medical costs and dropping home values. To somehow suggest that the issues faced by the wealthy are exclusive to them is simply retarded.

Look, I don’t begrudge anyone for being wealthy. Heck, I hope to be one of them one day. But if and when that happens, you can be certain that you won’t hear me calling myself “middle class” or saying that I’m just “barely getting by” or that $1,200 each month isn’t enough to cover my wants.

The story ends with this quote from the wife of the family making $250,000.

“I’m not after sympathy. We are blessed. What I want is a reality check on what rich means,” Ms. Parnell says.

I really hope she said that with tongue in cheek, but I have a feeling the irony of her remark was lost on her.